Little Ones

When you’re young, you’re naive and you’re friends with everyone, and then you get older, and you only have a handful of friends you really hang out with and everyone else becomes acquaintances. That’s when you know you’ve grown up because you come to the realization that you actually dislike people and you question why the hell you’re friends with anyone that doesn’t make your lifestyle better in any way, shape, or form. So I guess congratulations on adulthood, where you alienate almost everyone and become cynical about everything.

I HATE EVERYTHING!!!! fhjehgesjbgjwebgiquv4tghu3irbjkvw dsz.hybi34ursdjgko irbluyehtfkoz dlbhq89eirung djweacinkFUUUUUUUUUCK!

Cooking

I love the idea of cooking, all the possibilities, all the things that you can create. Everything fine tuned to your tastes, all of it can be altered and no one will give a damn if it isn’t exactly like the recipe provided it turns out well. You can throw things together and mix them and they may or may not come out delicious or how you want it. Every recipe is a guideline, it’s not a law that you must follow, you’re free to throw your ideas together and change the way it’s made. You put your own time and ingredients together to make a dish and you nourish and nurture it like a child constantly altering the taste until you get it the way you want it to be. I love how you don’t have to commit your whole life into a dish, that you can put however much time you want or possess into it. I love the fact that it’s a trial and error type of thing, maybe you altered it too much and it turns out shitty the first time, but you can always make that same dish again and maybe the next time it will turn out well. I love how versatile and volatile every dish is, every ingredient changes the way it tastes. I love how you don’t quite necessarily have to have the exact amount of an ingredient, but at the same time if you used less of this or more of that it can come out different. It’s great that you don’t have to follow anyone’s rules in cooking and you can follow any way you heart desires to cook something, but if you had followed someone’s rules it can turn out completely different, better or worse. I love the fact that there are levels of difficulties of cooking, some take more time and more effort, others not so much, but you don’t have to progress any further if you don’t want to. I love how you can nurture the food but you can end it’s life if you really wanted to. I love everything about cooking because there’s no wrong or right way,to cook, I love the fact that you don’t have to cook for someone, but for yourself. I love the IDEA of cooking, but I truly hate taking the time to cook. That being said, I do cook a lot though.

Imperfections

I’m not interested in perfection, I’m more interested in imperfection, especially in a girl. What I look for in a girl is their imperfections, seeing if it’s compatible with my imperfections. So, I guess in a way though I am looking for perfection, since perfection is opinionated. A girl with the right imperfections that are compatible to my imperfections would definitely be called the perfect girl for me. I don’t believe I’m perfect, in fact, I know I am in no way perfect. Humans weren’t meant to be perfect because if we were, everything would be solved and there would be no risk or negative consequence in anything. We are imperfect because it’s in our nature to be so, we are constantly searching for something more, whether it’s knowledge, life, or love. We are imperfect because of the very essence of our being, we are flawed creatures. We don’t all want to live mundane lives, we want something greater, we want to be something more, and achieve great things. It’s our greatest aspect and yet it’s also our downfall. Humans are imperfect and you know what, I’m completely fine with it.

I don’t know what fuck I’m doing anymore

I want to read a book on a sunny beach and not be bothered by time. I want to feel the sunshine on my face and hear the waves crashing on the sand, without a worry in the world. I want to go for a swim on a hot day without feeling the bustle of work. I want to lay on the warm sand without a single burden on my shoulders.

Dreamed of a girl, I don’t think I’ve ever seen before. Everything was so real, touch, smell, all of it. I only remember her hair color and the bottom half of her face, and her neck… why do I remember her neck so damn well?

In my mind, things have to mean something because if they didn’t mean anything then they wouldn’t be worth remembering, and if they aren’t worth remembering then why do I exist at that place and at that point in time? Everything has to mean something… at least to me.

A wanderer is not necessarily lost. I’m just moving about finding my right path, trying to find a silver lining in every aspect of my life. I’m constantly searching but it doesn’t mean I lost something.

Like a Smoothie

Imagine yourself as a delicious smoothie, mixed with your delicious emotional feelings. Well that’s pretty much how I feel about this girl, and she’s not just any girl. One part of me wants to be something more than friends. The other part of me wants to stay as friends. The only problem is we have some history, we’ve crossed the friendship line before and then had a falling out of sorts but now we’re good friends again. I’d like to think it’d turn out differently if we crossed the line this time around but I don’t want to ruin our good friendship if it doesn’t and I don’t know if she feels the same way. One thing I know for sure is that I like her and I’d fight for her this time around. Should I tell her?

Perfect Stranger, Perfect Night

Dear Mystery Girl,

Our whole day together felt so surreal, like something straight out of a movie. You approached me in a restaurant, we were both eating alone and you sat down at my table right across from me. We ate and we exchanged stories, it felt as though I had known you my whole life. We both knew we wanted something, we just didn’t know what. One thing was for sure, we were both lonely and you were heartbroken spilling your troubles to me, and I listened. We spent the whole day together knowing that we would probably never meet again. For one whole day we forgot the world and transcended into happiness away from all our troubles, the perfect day. We didn’t exchange names or numbers, but we did what anyone else would do on a date, we chatted and ask questions about each other. Spending the whole day just roaming wherever our hearts desired. Maybe the fact that we knew we would never see each other again made our time together that much more enjoyable. I enjoyed your company and the time we shared. Maybe we’ll see each other again somewhere, anywhere, and we’ll smile at each other knowing the time we spent together would only be ingrained in our own two memories. Maybe if we ever meet we’ll exchange names, but would that devalue our time spent together? Who knows… but nonetheless that was one of the weirdest and best experiences of my life. Thank you.

P.S. I just realized, that had I eaten anywhere else or eaten at that place at a different time, we would have never met. Out of all the chances in the world we met at that exact moment, anything could have deviated our paths from crossing but it didn’t it kept on flowing. What are the odds. What are the chances. I don’t even know what to think anymore.

When You’re Down

Just think, whenever you’re depressed or sad or feeling lonely. Think of all the creatures and other humans on the planet, and maybe any other life form out there. You could have been born as a single celled organism, any other person, or any animal, but you weren’t. You were born as you and yes, you’ve made mistakes, and yes, you’ve disappointed people. It doesn’t make that the end of the world because you’ve probably made someone’s day enjoyable also. You living and breathing have altered someone else’s life and it’s not all bad because you’ve impacted someone’s life and shown them happiness. Everyone makes mistakes, but people rise from their mistakes, it’s as a human being that we can adapt to situations and choose whether or not to learn from our mistakes. You were born a human and not only that you were born with the life you live, you’re not living anyone else’s life but your own. So rise up from all of that and be happy that you’re able to survive and live during this time. There will always be someone who’s smarter, always someone who will be better looking, so stop worrying about other people and live your own life because you are unique. So enjoy as much as you can in your life.

Decisions

I often look back on the decisions I made in the past and wonder if I made the right choice or not. There’s a lot of things I wish I had done differently, but in the end you chose the path that led you to where you are now. I realized three things, the grass will always seem greener on the other side no matter what, the choices you made are already done and you shouldn’t dwell on them thinking of what you could have done and what could have been, and the most important of them all is to know that there will be more decisions in the future and that you should make decisions that best interest you because it’s your life and only you can decide how you want your life to turn out. Taking that all into account you should listen to the advice of people who are more seasoned because they might have went through everything you’ve been through, but in the end know that only you can make your own choices.